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May. 13th, 2008 @ 04:33 pm I am fire and water - steam
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How, "it's all good" works in my life:


I feel a sense of connection to the all one that we all are-  that everything is

I call this awareness grace. What do you call it in your life?
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May. 2nd, 2008 @ 09:06 pm when will we hear about rev. Wrights sexist theories too?
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That Reverend Wright reminds me of Detroit.

It is a fine line between Afrocentric knowledge and Afrovictim conspiracy theory.

That Reverend reminds me that not everyone is aware that we all learn uniquely.  Yes culture can have it's affect.  Yes some cultures are more out loud and some are quiet.  We must remember that in every culture their are introverts and extroverts, people who learn in a visual, kinetic, audio and every combination known and unknown way. 

Obama cutting loose from his church must have triggered something.

I watched a Greek funeral scene in a film and started crying for my loss.  I left the church because of what they said and did.  I left their sexism knowing that was not the way for me to honor god.  But, that meant I sacrificed a lot of what I loved on this earth.  Thankfully that sacrifice made room for other cherished blessings.

yes we are all one.
no there is not just one way. 
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Apr. 29th, 2008 @ 06:59 am Living in the here and now. Constantly evolving.
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While talking to a friend I've known for more than a decade, she cut off what I was saying to tell me she couldn't believe that I responded gently to something I witnessed.  She did that thing that we tend to get from family members- she boxed me in and refused to experience me in the moment.  Her fantasy and projection was stronger than the reality of the situation.  She needs me to be the ball busting, boundary defining, roaring feminist, bad cop so she can be the sweet, hippy good cop. But, I've never fully categorized her as the hippy good cop, not even upon her insistence.  I know that she sometimes has problems defining boundaries, but, that doesn't define her and all her actions.  It defines some of her past experiences.  As for her characterization of me, it is in response to the role I've slipped into for her.  She hasn't been to any of the yoga classes I've taught, hasn't seen me at work in any capacity, she doesn't really know me as well as she thinks she does. I appreciate friends who are able to understand where I come from without forcing me into a box defined by their past perceptions or needs. After all, aren't we evolving?
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Apr. 28th, 2008 @ 09:38 am chapters
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Chapter One:
Childhood: 5 years with both parents. 11 divorce war years 8 that icluded my secret stepfather. Great big extended family of cousins aunts, uncles. I loved them all, was loved by them all and learned wonderfully from each of them. Siblings...sisters were kind of mythic and out of reach in their tall stature and years older, brother and I had a psychic connection. Trips to ancestral land, summer camp and Mackinaw Isle.
Asthma and diabetes gave me and my best friend more zest and zeal than a hundred kids combined, regardless of what we were given to survive.  We were happy go lucky and high adventure.

Chapter Two:
The Avante Garde Era of my life. Free Spirited, highly creative, driven, joyous postmodern hummingbird with wings fashioned of tarnished steel. Metro Area, tri state area, Canada, Chicago, New York, Deeeeetroit (is a good place to be from). Ultra cool without trying, unaware of youthful beauty, charming without any intention to be.  Proving that a rich life can be lived without any attachment to money or material things. Locally celebrated by the avant garde "scene" & noticed by the mainstream.  Art was movement, words and installation.

Chapter Three:
Motherhood. Highly conscientious pregnancy. 3 years married. 2 years nursing Hanz. Glowing, channelling Mother Goddess, earthy energy. Near Death Experience, pronounced dead in May of 91? "dead" for 1 min. 50 sec. ...5 or 6 years or more with Fork and Sasha in NOLA, living a tapestry of potluck dinners, dancing in the streets, reading Dr. Seuss, Poetry readings and performance art, sister hood, good friends like family, support of community, support of the giving gracious spirits of NOLA, NOLA gives out Masters Degrees in the fine art of living with soul...i double majored...Fire and Water energy, Orishas, Oya, Process process process, travel documentaries, exotic, exoticsploitation, Los Angeles, alone replaced by all one in a more conceptual way here, steadfast and true, comittment, strength pulled up from the ground, in from the air all around....develop technical skills, business skills, multi media expands to include film/video/computer graphics. Advair and Singulair are invented and my struggles with breathing END! Los Angeles lacks soul...living with that and making ripples as i do ....writing becomes more philosophical, more Zen like, more like prayers for grace with ease in the world....


Chapter Four: The Maude (as in Harold n Maude) years- to be continued....
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Apr. 26th, 2008 @ 09:37 am mind your children
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( a theory )


It is not a coincidence that the people who opened a new perspective on drug use when they were in their teens are the same folks drugging their children more than ever.  They waited till they were decades older than past generations to become first time parents.  They were  taking prescribed, legal drugs that alter the mind and physically damage the brain in order to avoid stress, pain, anxiety, grief and any uncomfortable, natural process.  It's no coincidence that many of the parents who are too old (mental, emotional state) to enjoy the noise of youth, to run with and dance wildly with the little rough housers they brought into this world when they were past their personal prime (with the aid of prescribed drugs) are putting their little ones on mind-altering, personality shifting, mess your brain up permanently- drugs.  In some cases the child's brain chemistry is different than what we could expect from generations past (pre- recreational drug era).   Those children require a unique approach we are too self involved or ego driven to discover.  Others are just regular children, with brains that function just fine, who are being raised by people who just don't want to deal. 

The middle class suburbs and the lower class  ghettos are full of children stuck in a in a culture that doesn't allow them to be children, outside playing and making up games, being loud and wild.  This generation is exposed to different things in a different way than any before- radically different.  Meanwhile the institutions we force our children into have not kept up with the changing world around them.  We're trying to fit our children into unsuitable molds.  The system continues to suffer without the change that addresses how unique and different from past generations the new generations are.  How worldly, how exposed, how quick to learn and get over the boring details  -  How amazing they are.  They're approaching play in a new way.  We can learn from them.

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Mar. 29th, 2008 @ 11:46 pm raven
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Right now I am beaming.  I happened across live African Music from the Congo tonight.  Live music that carries a message (dolphin) makes me beam.

As I left I called my son (deer).  He heard it in my voice (crow).  I exclaimed gleefully, " The music!  The spirit!  We must go to Africa again, see more of it, stay even longer!" 
"Yeah, I was thinking that too mom."  He was thinking that for me (racoon).

Then I found myself in traffic at 11 PM on the 405.  People were driving rude as usual, cutting each other off.  One had his brights on, another sped up to prevent someone from fitting in the space...rookie driver still actually believes  signaling will help him change a lane in L.A. - hah (fox)

I begin wondering again.  A question I should take out of my loop comes up, "what the fuck am I doing in this town with hardly any opportunity for the working class to happen across good, live music?!?!?!"  (chick'n little) Live music makes me glow...Of course there is music here...I was spoiled living in a culture (New Orleans) where I heard it just walking and running errands...

Then I read this story  (deer,crow, raven) that made me hummm like a woman older and wiser than my years ...nodding yes yes yes  and humming while reading, "mmmhmmm"... witnessing, attesting...Stand by me is one of my sons all time favorite movies...I'm here to  bring stories like our stand by me into this world.  I'm here to here to tell herstory. I've learned so much here (swan) about storytelling with moving pictures.  I'm here to share stories lived that don't compare to any a story any male has ever lived and yet it is universal...the one Tara, Davka , Fork, Lasca, Jane, Avalon, Sean, Asia, Sara, Nikki, Pearl, Patti, Sam, Octavi, Ayanna, Nzinga, Katina, Joanne, Lillith, Eve, Anahita, Inanna, Magdalene, and Mary really lived and are still living.

Yesterday at work, I gently defended women's perspective in film (otter) and listened patiently to a 23 yr. old boy (coyote) say, "Woman do not have the funny gene.. like white men can't box like black men".  I told him about my son and I laughing so hard we couldn't take it anymore while watching Ellen's HBO special for the third time..The 23 yr old boy  doesn't know about less opportunity and fewer chances of actually hearing a female overcoming social stigma to make people laugh at her.   He doesn't understand .  No one has illustrated it yet.  He is a writer /director whose film is being made by the boys club...He doesn't even come from privilege other than being a white male...In response to his beliefs about women, I made that sound old women on the porch make when a youngster goes by dressed like a hoochie..Mm mm mmmm (nodding no no nooo)
(armadillo, ant)

I hear the music in my heart. (dolphin)

I know what I am doing here. (whale)

These are exciting times. (hummingbird)

My purpose (lion, horse) makes me glow...Soon enough (white buffalo) , I'll be able to come in and out of this town (beaver), work anywhere (badger, skunk), making film (eagle).

That music is with me all the while, in my heart,
in my soul...
I keep my chin up (black panther), let my hips sway once in awhile (grouse) and above all

I thank the ancestors.
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Mar. 15th, 2008 @ 12:02 am the best side effect of all
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At 13 yrs., I was a dancer and a cheerleader. I was tiny and like my mom, wore petite sizes.
It was late autumn, the weather changed radically and my lungs were not standing up to it...not enough to cheerlead,  be in the Greek Folk dance group, choreograph and teach my aerobics class, or continue learning West African dance at the International Institute ( my parents didn't know about the latter two).  My breathing had become so compromised I couldn't sleep...couldn't lay down, couldn't eat or talk without having to stop and catch my breath.  It got progressively worse throughout the week until finally the EMT's drove me to the hospital.

The doctors gave me the lecture about waiting till it got so bad, while the nurses stuck me with epinephrine, IV drips, the phlebotomist took my blood gasses and  the resp. therapist gave me an albuterol treatment.  I didn't have to list my meds, they knew me at that hospital.  On that particular visit, my improvement was slow.  Slow enough to scare the doctors into giving me prednisone.

I remember experiencing the more obvious side effects first.
We didn't know it then, but my euphoria was not part of my usual "happy patients get released sooner" strategy, it was the initial side effect.  The tears of joy followed by the tears of anxiety were also not known to be side effects then, but, I recall experiencing the shift and using it as inspiration to mediate longer than usual.  The euphoria and odd tears faded as is typical of those side effects for prolonged use.  I was breathing better than ever before and figured the extra oxygen to my brain was what kept me from falling asleep.  In the hopes of getting some rest, I drank chamomile, wrote in my journal, cleaned my room,  meditated, masterbated, and finally managed a bit of sleep before heading back into my schedule of activities and advanced classes.  I hadn't made the connection between what I was experiencing and the medicine that was new to my body.  I didn't know it was a symptom then, so, when I was at cheerleading and my knees hurt and ankles swelled, I figured I injured myself and didn't feel it due to adrenalin.  It wasn't until my tenth day on prednisone that the most obvious side effect took over.  I awoke with a moon face and realized my bloating that I thought was pre-menstrual was out of control.  I couldn't fit into any of my clothes.  My shoes were tight.  My face looked alien. My mother kept her cool while she phoned the lung specialist and made the appt. to take me in right away.

The lung specialist gave us a referral.  My mother and I found ourselves in a therapists office.  The therapist had a tick and kept talking to me about self control and eating just one Oreo instead of the whole package, how girls can eat due to stress or PMS...the pressures of being in Middle School, etc.  I must have had a perplexed look on my face, because he felt the need to take out a tray of cookies and demonstrate how hard it is to eat just one.  My mother was furious, I could tell she was restraining herself from slapping this man.  She sat there in her skirt suit and fancy blouse, with her jewelry, perfect hair and make- up and spoke through clenched teeth, " We don't have garbage like that in our home"  I explained that we make our own pastries and cookies for special occasions and times when we have company.  My mother continued, her speech pattern more slow and deliberate and again, through clenched teeth, "This is my daughter who doesn't like sweets, she dances, she exercises everyday, she eats what I eat, you don't see my face all round...She has gained 20 lbs in 10 days!"  He sat there, tick twitching and blinking and she continued, "You should pay us to help you.  You are crazy!"  and with that we left his office.

I weaned off the prednisone as was planned.  Back then Dr.s prescribed a high dose they weaned us off of over a period of time determined by how much you scared them in the hospital.  Once off prednisone, I peed and peed, my appetite came back ( oh yeah, it distends the belly and makes you feel full, so you don't eat- you just get huge) I was able to wear my cheerleading uniform again, my shoes fit, my joints stopped aching.  Relief from the symptoms was instantaneous.

Years later, they admitted some of the side effects of prednisone.  Weight gain, moon face, fluctuations in appetite, etc. etc. eventually the list of possible side effects was 6 pages long.
I decided not to read the list.  Instead, I chose listen to my body and respond with as many healthy home remedies I knew of.  Once while I was on prednisone and meditating, I had the sudden realization that the distended stomach and swelling I was experiencing was due to mineral loss.  I stormed my body with minerals in several different concentrated ways.  It slowed the weight gain and took the edge of the distended abs.  When my kidneys started to hurt, I acted with my herbal knowledge...I didn't know it hurt kidneys until I felt it in mine.  I figured that as long as I was listening and paying attention to my body, I didn't need the list.  I listened to my intuition and didn't take signs for granted, thereby allowing myself to be directed to the leaves, plants, roots and foods that would help me.

Eventually, I  put a perspective twist on it (it took a decade to really practice consistently).  I saw side effects and asthma as a catalyst for learning.  The limitations of the medical world led me to experiment and open my mind to other avenues of support.  I was learning about the fragility of our gift of life and the support from the plant world, the universe in general, that we can tune into and utilize.  Rather than focus on why and what else, I learned to focus on what I was actually experiencing in the moment and making choices about it right then and there.  Meditation gave me the ability to see more clearly.  Meditation informed me  to ask what instead of why.  By age 14 I was studying herbalism and nutrition, listening to my body, mind and spirit and responding accordingly - not a bad side effect.
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Feb. 10th, 2008 @ 07:37 pm Mind Altering Medium
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I can shift
In my 20's as an artsy scenester in Detroit and NY
I knew a lot of people who took drugs to get intoxicated
Alcohol, Mescaline, Pot, LSD, MDMA
I could shift in and out of the intoxication without
having to ingest the toxin
by tapping into the part of the brain that was being stimulated
and riding that wave length
When it was time to drive or sleep or leave the nightclub,
time to
leave the parade
I just shifted out of that state of consciousness
I've been able to shift like that since I was a kid
I don't know if that was due to Yoga, TM, Asthma or if it was just
a gift
I just could
and I played with that ability

I also chose not to shift in and could put up a boundary
when a wave length put me off
Like the time everyone seemed to be on Coke

In this city a lot of people are intoxicated by greed, ruthlessness and other
fear based toxins
That is not the wavelength for me

I can shift
I can help others shift
I've done it with guided meditation, yoga, trance and dance, theatre, performance and
Now film

that's what I'm here for.
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Feb. 10th, 2008 @ 06:57 pm Sophisticated Audience
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We all know
candy that is shaped like berries are symbolic toxins. Our children ingest them cause we can't afford the country and school at the same time
We all know
what commercials are doing when they display for us: a cute kid, dancing bear and person who is celebrated for pretending really well
We all know
when we are being lied to, as animals we have instincts
as humans we begin to rationalize or go into denial
One can say they did something for this or that reason, wrap it up all diplomatic
the truth aches to get out
in the case of visions being shot down, no reasons make sense
We all know
the Truth aches to get out
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Feb. 9th, 2008 @ 05:40 pm
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I am doing it with unconditional love and grace....all of it.
Film, Commercial, Music Video, Documentary,
all of it
everything I do
is with unconditional love.
Even where it's said it can't be done that way- the film industry is known for a less loving way- So?
I'm sure there is a Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. quote out there that suits this perfectly- He didn't spit back when some unknown ass spit on him. He made a more profound statement with his resolve to love that person.

I am focused on living, growing, accomplishing with love.

To the ruthless, that I encounter on my path out here in L.A., I quote that great man saying, "I don't like you, but, I love you".

Unconditional love strengthens...if you feel as fragile as glass, practice authentic Agape- it is strengthening.
Understanding the motivation behind something and forgiving, while protecting, encouraging, supporting is loving. The honesty in unconditional love cancels out doormat behavior.

Unconditional love is not only quiet and meditative. It doesn't mean everything fits into a hole or box. Anyone who had a mother who loved them unconditionaly, knows that.

So a challenge came up this week. I gave myself a day to release it. I give myself a lifetime to see the grace in all of it.

I have work to do. I continue in this incarnation to do that work. It is easier for me to maintain integrity and succeed than it is to be ruthless. I chose to stay alive to re-mind people of miracles. I am a miracle. Life is a miracle.
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Jan. 1st, 2008 @ 08:47 am One Word
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Agape
Originally uploaded by Thomai
Some of us like to use a word for the year, rather than a To Do list with resolve.
As adults, most of us have plans and know what we like and choose to increase in our lives . Choosing one word to inform the year, helps increase the energy that the word carries for us, into the year.

Why one word?
When I taught Yoga every week at a corporate gym, I recall very few of the "Resolution-ites" sticking around until Spring.
One year, I decided to become proactive with them, rather than just noticing or joking about the temporary state of "resolution".
At the end of each class, during chanting, I would ask them to let out the one word that described what they would like to experience more of.
Words I could identify were, "Joy, Grace, Love, Compassion, Good Health. "
No one said,  "Lose weight", thank goodness. Good health was popular though.
When I awakened this morning  I realized  that I have not settled on one word yet.
One friend tells me, "It's the year of Harvesting."  He used "Building bridges" to guide him last year.  Seeing how that went,  I'm sure he'll be harvesting the fruit of many a seed in the coming year.
As for me, hearing the word "Harvest" sounds good and is going to be a part of my year, but, will it be the major signifying theme?  I'm reminded of the seeds I am just now planting.
Last year my word was Learning.  Specifically, learning more about the Film medium. I accepted every opportunity to learn and develop new Film Making skills. I learned to work in Excel, how to make a budget in Point Zero and Excel, I learned how to Schedule a Production, Break Down a Script, Write a Tagline, and a Synopsis and I learned more about writing a script. I learned about Contracts, how to read them and write them (there is still more to learn of course). I learned that I can Hire, Negotiate Deal Memos and Contracts, run a bigger budget Production and do it well and with grace.  I was more organized than ever before and developed new organizational skills.  I re-learned and honed AD skills.  I learned a new skill with every Film job I accepted.  I didn't earn as much money as I could have in those jobs.  As a matter of fact, I often accepted half  the going rate for the job, so that I could learn.

I think Abundance is perhaps more suitable for me this year. As in:  financial abundance, abundance of great opportunities, abundance of good work, abundance of joy, abundance of faith, abundance of grace and compassion...

Yes, this year my word is
 ABUNDANCE
and so it is!
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Dec. 6th, 2007 @ 08:30 am re-member storyteller, stream of consciousness writing
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Once in awhile, bits and pieces of my life story spill out...and some of the things I've experienced, the places I've been are described a bit... I see and feel doubt in the listeners body language, a language I am fluent in.  They simply can't (and I am not invested in helping them get past that) believe it.  Or they don't want to believe it because, what does that mean about their story?  They are listening with ego (it's not really listening)...and Maybe I am sharing with ego too (it's not really sharing)?

~ It's a moment of forgetfulness. ~
I have forgotten in that moment that I do not need anyone to bear witness. A witness is a luxurious, nutritious treat.
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Jan. 15th, 2007 @ 07:42 am
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Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
spoke of the 3 ways  Greeks define love:
Eros - romantic love
Filia- friendly love
and
Agape - unconditional love

He preached about his dislike of certain people and the way they were behaving, the catastrophes they were causing, their laws, etc. He wasn't about  to promote the behavior or the sick, twisted laws that supported ill behavior. In fact, he stood in defiance, rose up with activists like Rosa Parks and asked that others rise with him to change what was the norm & the evils accepted by the mainstream/ the majority. He was once vilified for that defiance when he originally set out (with many others) to direct positive change. He went as far as to preach a different form of Christianity than his father preached before him. He didn't threaten fire and brimstone, he incorporated the philosophy of the Greeks, of Mohandas Gandhi, the ancient wisdoms of West African Proverbs and spiritual practices, he expanded and rose above any and all classifications a human could fall into. No, he didn't like every one, yet, he loved every one unconditionally. His work encouraged Agape for all of humanity. In that love, anger and fear can not rule a person. In that love one can be strengthened and expand.
.
If we think of it,  meditate on it or pray, we can realize Agape in everything. It's something I find worthy of conscious effort.

No, i don't like sexism, racism, homophobia, i don't like backstabbing behavior, lies, betrayals, i don't like cowardice,elitism, exclusion, yet, i can still find good, i can  love. Love  from a different perspective. Love that comes from the knowledge that we are all one.
This love inspires my work in service of humanity.

I believe Dr. MLK Jr. would have been happy to know that so many of us reflect on the unconditional love he preached about on the day we celebrate his birth.... and during the season for non-violence...and etc...thinking in such a way is good habit forming.


Making the choice of financial wealth.
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Jan. 14th, 2007 @ 01:09 pm Wisdom discovered online
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a suggestion for processing betrayal:


GYMNASTICS
KC and the Sunshine band is singing "shake your booty" in the background...so far I've heard R&B, Salsa, and Hip - Hop while watching Collegiate Gymnastics on a sports channel. Amazing! the beauty of Collegiate Gymnastics is how healthy the women are. Both physically and emotionally, these gymnasts are not in the midst of sacrificing everything  for the sport. Of course it requires extreme sport discipline, but, there is a layer of desperation that is missing from what I usually sense in non-collegiate sports. These women, yes, women, not girls, are at University, most of them have passed thru either the jubilation of winning championships and medaling at the Olympics or the disappointment of not being number one in the world. It seems like they are enjoying it more.The musical choices are more interesting, the floor work choreography is often more entertaining...these are mature, strong gymnasts who have more personal control over their own lives than we are accustomed to seeing at the Olympic level. None of them looks starved. The youngest & smallest are actually the ones less likely to "stick it"...no surprise- electrolights work ya'll....This kicks ass- it ought to be shown on regular/ non cable TV...and i'd like to direct the camera's.
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Aug. 2nd, 2006 @ 11:03 am etymology- lance
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freelance:
"medieval mercenary warrior," 1820, from free + lance; apparently a coinage of Sir Walter Scott's. Fig. sense is from 1864; the verb is first attested 1903.
lance:
c.1290, from O.Fr. lance, from L. lancea "light spear" (It. lancia, Sp. lanza, Ger. Lanze), possibly of Celt-Iberian origin. The verb meaning "to pierce with a lance" is from c.1300; the surgical sense (properly with ref. to a lancet) is from 1474. Lance corporal (1786) is from obsolete lancepesade "officer of lowest rank" (1578), from O.It. lancia spezzata "old soldier," lit. "broken lance."

oh that is so warrior. i am open to the wise way of committing to a team worthy of my gifts for the long run!
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Jul. 22nd, 2006 @ 11:06 am re-member dream shadow reflected human light essence unsequenced stream transcendence
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Moving from Detroit to New Orleans was a matter of fluxus. As part of the process that moved us from Detroit  to New Orleans, my sister Fork and I wrote ritualistically.  We allowed words to manifest randomly and spent hours working and recreating a cut up technique we'd learned about thru her fascination with Burroughs.  I began creating symbols.   Hundreds of dots, lines and squiggles filled pages, one after the other.  We were influenced by our 2 year old son's as they were teaching us of duality, signs, how symbols receive their power and become charged as well as how to mix colors and make music.  Their random and profound acts of creation informed our way of being in the world and vice/versa.  Our children eased our way into trance. Children, in particular toddlers, emanate a high like no other.  They are in complete awe!  Their feelings are immediately shared.  Their feelings  reside on the surface as well as deep within.  Toddlers  are the ultimate example of fluxus.

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Jul. 5th, 2006 @ 11:52 am KaleidaSCOPE RE-flections
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Life as a female on this planet has inspired my imaginary female punk rock band

the name of the band:
Super Cooch
I sing and play bass once in awhile. we have 2 bassists,  1 guitar, a trumpet and a double peddled drummer.
CD title:
"Suck my Clit"
featuring songs like:
" you fear my feminasty then you call me the feminazi?"
"i don't need balls, I have SUPER COOCH"
the humorous song:
" Feminine famine"
and etc.


 I've also been day dreaming about how certain  flavors go well together
such as:

Tom Waits
Burgundy St. New Orleans
Road Trip in a jallopy or by bus and train and jallopy
Mollys at the Market on Decatur street, after waitstaff hours
a grey day all year round, regardless of season
Guilietta Masina
Sean Penn
Charles Bukowski
cheap balckberry wine from the Liquor store
Camels wide
W.S. Burroughs
whisky
riffle bullets
lumpy mashed potatos with gravy
bisquits
Chilli from a can
Sardines with Saltines
stinky cheese
Edith Piaff
Big Daddys Backstage(bathroom)
Johnny Cash
Bouzouki
Ouzo
Rhebetika
home made pasties
and
Robert johnson
Verti Mart
Brooklyn Subway Smells
Crawfish and Gumbo pot scent from restaurants in the Quarters

Nick Cave and St. Andrews Hall both work for the list above & the following 2 combo's/lists 
I guess Nick ties it all together



Diamonda Galas
torn fish net stockings held up with garters
Winter, cold Winter
long black feathers
Gene Jenet
Harlaftis Argilos
black licorice
East Village, New York City
Chelsea, New York City
Einsterznede Neubeatin
Virgin Prunes
basement of Asylum
Big Daddys mingling
Chris n Cosy
Psychic TV
Ann Rice
Maria Callas
Black Lace
ReSearch Magazine
broken glass
Nat Shermans
Exu
cold, wet, hard, piercing wind
Clarino/Clarinet
Long, silk, circa 1920's, full fringed, white fur collared CAPE
Pointy spikey stilleto's


Angelina Jolie
first day of spring and last day of summer
Michigan art gallery
Willis Gallery
Co-op
Detroit, the Cass Cooridor Pre-Gentrification
Oya
Storm
Pomegranite
Red Riding hood
Air travel
Coral Sand, Bermuda
Persephone
Sword
Big Daddys On Stage
Kaldi's
Red Veil
Steak cooked rare
Joan Jett
Kit Drum
Josephine Baker
Stilt Walkers
Fire Breathers
run aways
red NaNa boots
Mini Skirt
Push Up Bra
bells
All Day Parallel RED lipstick by Estee Lauder ( & the whole history of that lipstick)


Cafe' Brazil
Poetry readings
John Sinclair
Bandalogun
Long wide A-line Red skirt that spread while spinning
Mojitos
Summer Time
linen (fabric)
dread locks
sweat
old style ride- able bicycles
fringe suede jackets
blue jean jackets
winter boots with summer wear
summer dress, spaghetti strap , no bra
World Music crowd
Trapeze
sweet potato pie


Suburbs
School books
rock n roll
scent of #2 pencils and erasers
bangs
Hair long or in a bob
straight shiny hair
Sheryl Lee/ Laura Palmer
basement dancing to Sugar Hill Gang
Faded Blue Jeans
mercurochrome
bandaids
fence metal
wheat grass
Toys R Us
Mortadella sandwiches mande with "French" or "Italian" bread
Instant Coffee
Drambui from an unlocked liquor cabinet
dancing the Smurf
the Electric Slide
channel 62
Bill Bonds!




Marlboro Reds
Skipping school adrenalin
Coca cola
Shango
Santana
Hershey Chocolate
coffee
non dairy creamer (powder)
petty shoplifting
cherry pie
David Lynch
Black Flies buzzing around
Palmetto Bugs
Mavrodaphne
Chicago
life altering conversations with total strangers
Train trip
Walgreens
early Autumn
jumping the fence
sneaking in thru the backstage door
underage



best friend necklaces
snorkeldorf winter coats
icicles
matching outfits
MTV
Kool Aid
Jello or Knox Blocks Gellatin
Cousins
salt and pepper
Salt and Pepper
Spaghetti with Ragu out of the bottle sauce
2 liter bottle of 7-up
Rainbow Sherbert
Bubble Yumm Bubble Gum
Bubbles
french braids
walk together to school
banana walk man radio
Swing set rust
feild trip
the scent of basement home salons, perms etc.

sequins
Parades
g-strings
daddy backs
dancing on the table, on the bar, in the streets
Fire/pyro technics
grease paint
9th ward
heavy, slow, syrupy accents
sarsaparilla
ginger beer
rum n coke
warm rain
black n whites (uniform)
Cash Money Honey
hey boo
hootin n hollerin
masking
Ellegua
cigarette butts on sidewalks
cobblestone and broken cement
tree roots
candy
steam
Gumbo
Crawfish
Po' boys
traditional Jazz
Ellis Marsalis
Snug Harbor
Anthony Duree
gimme sum shug ah
wine-ohs
hobo symbols



Soda pop
the POP shop
Windsor
Mods
Mr. Rogers style cardigan
Hats
long overcoat of wool
Navy p coat
Toronto
Ochosi
the Cure
Pet Shop boys
the Waterboys
english  Guitar bands
U2
bridge across a cold river
citizenship
Wed. Night
winter
tues at the DIA
Tues movie night
Todds
D.J. 's that changed the life of it
identifying a persons talent before even meeting them formally
art scenesters
making up new dances
disappearing acts
magicians
gloves, the fancy type, the fits like a glove type
Katherine Denueve
David Bowie
Japan, David Sylvian, Mick karn
Ryuchi sakamoto
earth tones and bright red  or orange
kaleidoscope
big hair no make-up
big make-up no hair

the International Institue
Vegetarian, macro-biotic, vegan
Nursing
Spinache
black strap mollases
herbal tea
loud belly laughs
playing on the floor
making funny sounds
funny faces
playing
spin in circles till dizzy
plastic toys
mocassins
100% cotton
naturally dyed cloth
making paper
makin' groceries
grocery shopping
sing along
tone of voice consciousness
break patterns cycles, make a new tradition
blue
purple
Yemaya
spirit dads
spirit family
choices
creative conflict resolution
altars
charging symbols
sage
7 day candles
sea salt
essential oils
Mane and Tail
Sally's beauty supply
Coco butter
West African Dance
Yoga
 Meditation
California and uptown New Orleans near Tulane
Mc Donogh 15
laugh till you cry till you pee till it hurts so good
calendars
collage
poetry writing
cut ups
Andrei Codrescu
caravan
juice box

ivory soap
Michigan lakes
Pine
wet mossy earth
suede
corduroy
leather necklace rope
braids
Tom MCanne shoes
cool Showers
Hay
turn table
picnic table
fried chicken
Hank Williams Sr.
Patsy
German Sausage
individually wrapped sliced American Processed Cheese Food
James Brown
Etta James
Walking like the Monkeys
being goofy
being cool
Silly String
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Mar. 15th, 2006 @ 09:05 am Day 44, let go of guilt
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The blog and live journal world invites us to stick our noses in someone elses buisiness. We can find writing inspiration, comraderie, challenge our views, be supportive , it is a an inexpensive way to expand ones horizons. There are actual blog/journal friendships that form. Relating via internet allows us a more obvious way to experience the truth that what we do/say/write to others we/do/say/write to ourselves. When we are supportive of anothers process, we support ours, when we question anothers beliefs, we questions ours….and on. Who knew the virtual world was so tight with the spirit realm?….think about it, we connect with spirits here, not bodies, voices, clothing style… Yes, there are customizations that make ones journal more personal, but, we’ve all read great blogs that are basic n simple. In the Live Journal world, we have a Friends page where our selected friends journal entries show up on our template. Proving further that all communication is communication with self, all communication is commom union with spirit. Remember that next time you are confronted with someone's fear via angry words…they are talking to themselves, their god selves, like this. How angry (afraid) they must be …walla…compassion develops.

I began further depth in processing/eliminating guilt via an entry on a freinds journal...it ( continues )
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Jan. 29th, 2006 @ 08:44 am process evolves to a consistent state of peace
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A Season for Non-Violence begins tomorrow. Jan 30th - April 4th.
64 days between the anniversary of Mahatma Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.s assassinations.

for 64 days meditate on ways to peace...Develop and practice skills for Peaceful conflict resolution...if you can imagine it
it can be.


state of grace emanating from within...
The still, peaceful, strong mind.... regardless of surroundings...not bothered by a fly buzzing or greater distractions...responds with grace to the butterfly & the bullet equally. Being in that grace consistently results from committed practice. I have witnessed it. I achieve states of grace more easily, more often. I joke about the process and laugh about how, sometimes, it takes me a while to rise above. Sometimes jumping like those little hopping, mad dogs in slow motion. One moment in the air looking over a wall, above it all, another moment landing on the hard, cold ground using it to spring back up. Most time spent in-flight (the process) between the two places (states). Not quite hovering, not quite floating horizontal. The vertical movement expands allowing more time in-flight and new heights are achieved.
Eventually, it no longer requires a process (jumping off ground/platform)...a consistent state of grace can be achieved on this plane. Heaven on earth.

the spiral continues, rebirth (rise above) birth (land) rebirth ( rise/learn) the learning lasts longer as time continues the spiral slows and widens.
It may be like the last ring of a ripple that continues...
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Jan. 9th, 2006 @ 07:16 am Journey
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There are artists who come from wealth. They have every class, tutor, tool & assistant handed to them. They spend a small portion of their lives dependent until trust funds become available.
There are working artists whose fine art work, skills, tools, etc. are funded by various gigs and commissioned work.
There are struggling and starving artists.
There are artists dependent on social programs.
An artist is not determined by birthright, struggle, ease, sexual orientation, morals, values, friends, acquaintances, ancestors, intelligence, charm, beauty, location, religion, right or left handedness- size does not matter... What informs one persons art does not necessarily inform another's and can vary from moment to moment. An artist is one who seemingly can not repress creative inspiration... by any medium, by any means, an artist allows art to come through. Artists are not as uncommon as many artists like to believe. For instance, all mothers are artists.

In the end each journey has it's lessons, it's benefits, it's curses...the art that comes thru does not care either way.
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